A child who never stops, one who never finishes the task, one who explodes over nothing. It is often read as a lack of will or limits, and met with more pressure.
Diamond shows that stress is the first thing that takes executive functions out of play: "if you are sad, stressed, lonely or not physically well, the first thing to suffer is the prefrontal cortex". That is why she asks us to think, before labelling, about what that child is going through.
And she changes the question in the classroom and in the clinic: "a child may be behaving very, very badly because they are hurt and afraid of being hurt again. If the behavior comes from pain, we can react in a completely different way."